Recently I have been spending time with the High Priestess card from the Major Arcana of the tarot again. I love the tarot, though have generally leaned towards engaging with it from the perspective of personal development. I use shamanic journeys, path-workings and journaling to work with the archetypes rather than focussing on ‘reading’ in the sense most people think of it.
In August last year I completed a full cycle of giving a day to each of the Major Arcana cards. I carried each of them with me either as a card or a picture on my phone, paying attention to what happened each day and how I responded to it, looking at how this might relate to some of the main themes of the card. I spent time reflecting on how my experiences might help me look more deeply at what lessons that card had for me.
It was an extraordinary 22 days that grew progressively more intensive and challenging as it went on. Each card seemed to become a little more assertive, a little more present, a little more demanding. So much was pouring up from my subconscious that I journalled as if my life depended on it! By the end I was exhausted but felt emotionally picked clean (for the time being!)…utterly spent, but oh so internally charged, so released.
In the course of that cycle, the High Priestess was Day 3 and an interesting day for me. Several things happened that drew me into that energy. During the day I was confronted by somebody’s reaction to a piece I had written which (as a side point) acknowledged the existence of shadow within the Otherworld as it relates to shamanic journeying. I was surprised but respected their position and wished them well. However, it drew my attention to the ideas of light and shadow as necessary parts of the whole that we see in the High Priestess.
That evening I was facilitating a journeying group and found the High Priestess present once again as I spontaneously abandoned my prepared structure and simply allowed the space to unfold intuitively from moment to moment. Something magical happened as a result of that and I felt things…myself…shift into a much more deeply heart centred space. This was the lasting impression that the High Priestess made on me that day. She showed me what was possible when I surrendered control in that way and listened to, trusted, my inner guidance and instincts. It was an important experience for me.
This year I am working with the tarot again through music and poetry. I had just finished writing a song for the High Priestess when Northern Tamarisk posted a lovely article about her experiences with Persephone and the pomegranate (both are associated with the High Priestess archetype and the pomegranate often appears in the imagery on her card). It was a piece of synchronicity that was not lost on me, especially in the challenges of the coming days as we launched a crowdfunder campaign and I came up against the internal backwash of emotions that went with it. I found myself returning to the lyrics of my song and to the sense of moving between those worlds of light and shadow as part of an integrated whole.
The vibrant outer shell of the fruit, the pomegranate, splits to reveal hidden, fleshy innards filled with seeds…the secrets and deep knowledge held safely in the internal, silent, dark spaces within. It is this inner space that we must touch and find the courage to enter if we want to truly know ourselves.
“For in shadow you are truly revealed…” I have found those words comforting in recent days. So often it is only when we are challenged that we see our shadow, experience our buttons being pressed as the old wounds resurface. At these times our fears and resistance make themselves known, ask to be released so that we can live more fully. We can suppress it, project it, fear it, embrace it, endure it…but The High priestess I think, invites us to simply see it, to learn to look upon it with the eyes of the owl, our attention focussed beneath the surface to perceive the lesson, the undercurrent, the truth, the shadow within the light and the light within the shadow and to move with it rather than resist. She coaxes us towards balance, peace and self knowledge where we are not afraid to be explorers of our own soul and inner workings…eating the seeds of awareness that awaken us to growth and the possibility of healing.